Mighty-Morphing-Foundation-Agents-Episode-01-Raw

Here is the raw log of the escapades of Site 23's personnel on April Fool's Day, 2010. An edited version will be available in a few days. Enjoy.

Warning: Extreme awesome.

[18:50:15] < MisterFlames> MacKay's at the deak in the waiting room, with a plate of brownies beside him.   The brownies smell right, but with his taste buds still shot, he's not really in the mood for them. 
[18:50:48]  * Nioki is in the practice room, swinging away at dummies.
[18:57:56]  * Exuro is drawn to the waiting room by the smell of brownies.
[19:00:03] < MisterFlames> MacKay looks up as Exuro walks into Medical, and smiles to the man.  "Good day, can I help you?" 
[19:00:37] < Exuro> "I smelled brownies and couldn't help myself." <.<
[19:01:47] < MisterFlames> "I understand.   I felt in the mood to bake, even though I can't hardly taste anything right now."  MacKay nods, "If you'd like one, feel free."  
[19:05:13]  * Exuro takes a brownie from the plate. "Oooh, thanks."
[19:07:07] < Exuro> "Now, I have to go take care of something. Later, and thanks again. Always available to eat." <.<
[19:16:03] < MisterFlames> "I'll remember that, when I'm in the mood to cook again.   Take care."  MacKay smiles and nods.  
[19:54:43] < SophosBlitz> Alarms start blaring
[19:54:45] < SophosBlitz> *BLEEP*
[19:54:50] < SophosBlitz> *BLEEP* *BLEEP* BLEEP*
[19:54:59] < SophosBlitz> "WARNING! SECURITY LOCKDOWN! SECURITY LOCKDOWN!"
[19:55:39]  * Exuro looks up from examining the brownie to make sure it wasn't laxative-laced. "Awww, not again."
[19:55:53] < SophosBlitz> "SCP-076-2 HAS BREACHED CONTAINMENT IN SECTOR 76, ALL NON-COMBATANT PERSONNEL ARE TO EVACUATE THE SITE"
[19:56:03] < SophosBlitz> "ALL AVAILABLE COMBAT PERSONNEL ARE TO REPORT TO THE CAFETERIA"
[19:56:11] < SophosBlitz> *BOOM!!!!*
[19:56:15]  * Nioki stops hitting dummies, grabs his shirt, and runs for the cafeteria.
[19:56:29] < SophosBlitz> The entire site starts shaking because of an explosion
[19:57:01] < SophosBlitz> *BOOM*
[19:57:03] < SophosBlitz> More explosions
[19:57:23] < SophosBlitz> Researchers are all scrambling and screaming as they try to get away from the explosions as much as possible
[19:58:11] < SophosBlitz> By the time the agents reach the cafeteria, the room is completely empty save for the ones who just came in
[19:58:55] *** You're now known as O5-104
[19:59:44]  * Harley|Burns leaps to his feet.
[19:59:53]  * Exuro pops into the cafeteria, having ducked by his room to get his firearms.
[20:00:06] < O5-104> *BLEEP* *BLEEP* *BLEEP* *BLEEP*
[20:00:19] < O5-104> The alarms are *FREAKING* *LOUD* because PEOPLE ARE GODDAMN SLOWPOKES
[20:00:21]  * Harley|Burns runs to the cafeteria.
[20:00:46]  * Nioki arrives, struggling into his shirt.
[20:01:14] < O5-104> The cafeteria is empty save for the three that just came in
[20:01:31] < Exuro> "...Well, this sure is great, eh?"
[20:01:36] < O5-104> But for some reason, all of the furniture is gone except for a podium at the front where the food is usually served
[20:01:46] < O5-104> *BOOM* Another explosion shakes the site
[20:01:57] < O5-104> Suddenly, the room goes dark
[20:02:40]  * Exuro tenses his grip on his MP5, waiting to get disemboweled by a terrible something.
[20:03:09]  * Harley|Burns is calm, relaxed, and standing behind the other two.
[20:03:19] < O5-104> A spotlight appears and shines its light on the podium where a tall thin man in a forest green italian suit is standing at the podium, with his back to the agents
[20:03:55] < O5-104> He spins in place three times with his arms (and cane) outstretched before stopping himself to face the gropu
[20:04:11] < O5-104> "HELLO AGENTS." his voice booms
[20:04:28] < O5-104> *BOOM* Speaking of which, another explosion rocks the site
[20:04:43] < O5-104> "Let's keep this short since this is an emergency."
[20:05:04] < O5-104> [ "My name is ANDREW RYAN. Is a man, not entitled to the sweat of his brow?" ]
[20:05:28] < O5-104> "My name is Ten-Four. You may call me Mister Ten-Four or Sir."
[20:05:54] < O5-104> "And I am here because of the emergency situation and you're the only ones who can help."
[20:06:30] < Nioki> "What, exactly, is this emergency?"
[20:06:36] *** MisterFlames is now known as MacKay
[20:06:37] < O5-104> "You see, as you can tell, SCP-076-2 or 'Able', has broken containment and is destroying the site. We are all but ready to activate the on-site nuke but we really don't want to destroy this place."
[20:06:40] < Exuro> "...Right. And what would that entail?"
[20:06:52]  * MacKay sneaks into the cafeteria.
[20:07:37] < O5-104> "You don't want to die in an instantaneous explosion, correct? Well, I have a solution to our little problem."
[20:08:44] < Nioki> "Explosions. I thought Able only used... close and personal methods."
[20:08:52] < O5-104> "You will take part in using some experimental technology that has been developed VERY secretly that virtually no-one knows about. It will grant you a tremendous amount of power that'll let you rescue this site from destruction."
[20:09:12] < O5-104> "I'll get to that in a moment Agent Nioki."
[20:09:17] < Exuro> "And I thought Able was cooperative now..."
[20:09:32] *** You're now known as O5-104|Blitz
[20:09:40] < O5-104|Blitz> Blitz bursts in through the door
[20:11:03] < O5-104|Blitz> "Okay, now that our 5 members are here, let us continue." Ten-Four snaps his fingers and mini-pedestals appear from the ground in front of each person. On the pedestal looks like some sort of large badge/wrist-watch.
[20:11:29] < Harley|Burns> [GO GREAT MARTIAN KING!]
[20:12:08] < Exuro> "Well, that's convenient. And how long have we had a stage in here for?"
[20:12:43] < O5-104|Blitz> "In front of you are prototypes of Special Weapon X-94. They are advanced technological weapons of mass destruction that will let you be on even footing with little Able and his cybernetic future-weapons."
[20:13:56] < O5-104|Blitz> "Their function is simple. Strap it to your wrist, and use the passphrase, and it'll lock onto your genetic code so that you'll be the permanent users of the device."
[20:14:43] < O5-104|Blitz> "Then it'll *ENHANCE* your bodily strength, speed, stamina, perception and whatever else!!"
[20:14:51] < O5-104|Blitz> "You'll transcend to god-hood."
[20:14:57] < O5-104|Blitz> "There's only just one catch."
[20:14:58]  * Exuro raises an eyebrow. "Cybernetic future-weapons? Able?"
[20:15:02] < Nioki> "I... see."
[20:16:12] < O5-104|Blitz> "These weapons have been extensively tested to ensure that there are no detrimental side-effects to the user, so you'll be fine on the field."
[20:16:21] < Harley|Burns> "What is the catch?"
[20:16:57] < O5-104|Blitz> "Oh, just some paperwork you'll have to fill out later since you'll become official beta-testing labrats. Nothing complicated."
[20:17:28] < O5-104|Blitz> "Now, PICK UP THE WEAPON X-94'S!!"
[20:17:34] < O5-104|Blitz> "STRAP THEM ON!"
[20:18:04]  * Nioki wordlessly picks his up, and straps it on. Best to play along with the crazy man.
[20:18:06] < O5-104|Blitz> "AND PUNCH THE AIR WHILE SCREAMING THE PASSPHRASE...'LOVEY DOVEY CHECHEN SPARKLES!!!'"
[20:18:13] < Harley|Burns> "I refuse."
[20:18:19] < Nioki> "...what."
[20:18:36]  * Exuro picks one up and just... stares at the man.
[20:18:41] < O5-104|Blitz> "Hmm? Why not?"
[20:18:52] < Exuro> "...What." <.<
[20:18:55] < O5-104|Blitz> *BOOMBOOMBOOM* The explosions are starting to get more frequent
[20:19:23] < Harley|Burns> "To do so would dishonor my bond with the Captain."
[20:20:29] < O5-104|Blitz> "So...you're telling me that your bond with your Russkie captain is more important than say...a powerful new arm?"
[20:20:35]  * Harley|Burns gazes off into the distance. "Captain..." Is that a blush on his cheeks? What. What is this.
[20:21:07] < Harley|Burns> [What is this. Stop that. Captain Dmitri Arkeydrevich Strelnikov has no time for the gay.]
[20:21:24]  * MacKay shakes his head at this, then shrugs. "Okay, you talked me into it."
[20:21:28] < O5-104|Blitz> Sakura flower petals start flying around Harley.
[20:21:53] < Harley|Burns> "Oh, Captain..."
[20:21:54] < O5-104|Blitz> [ http://www.random.org/ Dice rolling starting soon. ]
[20:22:11]  * Exuro takes a good long look at his before strapping it to his wrist.
[20:22:42]  * MacKay reaches over and puts on the X-94, then recites "LOVEY DOVEY CHECKEN SPARKLES" while punching into the air. "This, sadly, is not the weirdest thing I have ever done."
[20:22:49] < O5-104|Blitz> Blitz warily stares at the device before another explosion in the site prompts him to put it on
[20:23:27]  * Nioki punches the air.
[20:23:33] < Harley|Burns> "My bond with the Captain is worth a million new arms!"
[20:23:40]  * Exuro sighs before punching the air. "LOVEY DOVEY CHECKEN SPARKLES."
[20:23:43] < Nioki> "LOVEY DOVEY CHECHEN SPARKLES!"
[20:24:05]  * Nioki 's voice is very, very loud when he shouts.
[20:24:18]  * O5-104|Blitz Blitz punches the air with his fist. "LOVEY DOVEY CHECHEN SPARKLES!"
[20:24:44] *** Rights is now known as RightsBoobies
[20:25:09] < MacKay> "I've done Rocky Horror, in a corset and a negligee.  Trust me."
[20:25:14] < O5-104|Blitz> Ten-Four frowns at Harley. "You don't want to save the site? Gain powers and transcend to god-hood?"
[20:25:38] < Nioki> "I'll take your word for it on that one."
[20:26:12] < MacKay> "Well, I don't care about godhood.  I'm just working on aiding the Foundation."
[20:26:16] < O5-104|Blitz> Ten-Four continues frowning at Harley who's the only one out of the five who doesn't have their hand in the air
[20:26:36] < Nioki> "I've already been a god once. This better be just as temporary."
[20:26:37] < Harley|Burns> "The Captain would be disgusted with me if I said that horrible phrase!"
[20:27:29] < O5-104|Blitz> "Your Captain already knows about this. He's holding back Able right this moment! He'll be more disgusted if you don't hurry to his side with this new power!"
[20:28:03] < O5-104|Blitz> "DO IT FOR LOVE, AGENT HARLEY! FOR JUSTICE!"
[20:28:24] < MacKay> "For great justice, already."   
[20:28:35] < O5-104|Blitz> Suddenly, another spotlight shines on Harley while more sakura petals fly around
[20:31:14] < O5-104|Blitz> [ Waiting on Harley... ]
[20:31:57] < Harley|Burns> "CAPTAIN! I WILL AID YOU IN YOUR HOUR OF NEED!" 
[20:32:21]  * Harley|Burns grabs the X-94. He straps it to his wrist!
[20:32:30] < Harley|Burns> "LOVEY DOVEY CHECHEN SPARKLES!"
[20:32:37]  * Harley|Burns TRANSFORMS!
[20:32:48] < O5-104|Blitz> A BRILLIANT FLASH OF LIGHT ENGULFS THE FIVE
[20:33:05] < O5-104|Blitz> LOTS OF SPARKLES AND FLYING COLOURED RIBBONS
[20:33:28] < O5-104|Blitz> THE SPARKLES EVOLVE INTO VARIOUS NAKED CHECHENS, RESURRECTED FROM THE DEAD
[20:33:38] < O5-104|Blitz> THEY PRANCE AROUND, SLOWLY STRIPPING EACH OF THE FIVE AGENTS
[20:33:52] < O5-104|Blitz> SPANDEX
[20:33:54] < O5-104|Blitz> HELMENTS
[20:33:54] < Exuro> "FFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-"
[20:33:55] < O5-104|Blitz> WEAPONS
[20:34:01] < O5-104|Blitz> AND A FRILLY MINI-SKIRT
[20:34:04] < O5-104|Blitz> THEY ARE
[20:34:29] < O5-104|Blitz> THE MIGHTY MORPHING POWER AGENTS
[20:34:37] < O5-104|Blitz> THE FIVE AGENTS WITH...*ATTITUDE*
[20:34:49] < O5-104|Blitz> Everybody roll 1d20 for initiative
[20:34:54] < Nioki> "What..."
[20:35:15] < Nioki> [6. Shit.]
[20:35:16] < MacKay> [13]
[20:35:20] < Exuro> ((Oh god... 20.))
[20:35:32] < Harley|Burns> [14
[20:35:33] < Harley|Burns> ]
[20:35:43] < O5-104|Blitz> [ 1 for Blitz. WOW ]
[20:35:59] < O5-104|Blitz> Exuro is RED
[20:36:01] < MacKay> [The dice do not love Blitz]
[20:36:04] < O5-104|Blitz> Harley is PINK
[20:36:09] < O5-104|Blitz> MacKay is BLUE
[20:36:13] < O5-104|Blitz> Nioki is YELLOW
[20:36:15] < O5-104|Blitz> Blitz is BLACK
[20:36:27] < Nioki> [/me runs away]
[20:36:47] *** Enki [~Enki@synIRC-A91E847A.lsanca.fios.verizon.net] has joined #scpactiveduty
[20:36:55] <&Break> 1d20 INITATIVE
[20:36:55] < Enki> Break, INITATIVE: 18 [1d20=18]
[20:37:27] < MacKay> "So I'm blue.   Okay, this helps me out how?"  MacKay checks himself over.  "Okay, so I'm very, very pretty." 
[20:37:48] < O5-104|Blitz> "LADIES AND GENTLEMEN OF THE OVERSEER COUNCIL, I PRESENT TO YOU...THE MIGHTY MORPHING FOUNDATION AGENTS!!!"
[20:38:02] < Exuro> "..."
[20:38:11] < Harley|Burns> "CAPTAIN! I'M COMING FOR YOU!"
[20:38:18] < O5-104|Blitz> While they were transforming, thirteen monitors had descended from the ceiling. Only their shadows are visible, but they're all clearly golf-clapping."
[20:38:38] < Nioki> "I'm surprised I'm not olive green. I always seem to get olive green with this kind of thing."
[20:38:41] < MacKay> "Blue Medic, online, I suppose."   MacKay snorts.   "Okay, thank you."  
[20:39:02] < Exuro> "...At least red isn't bad."
[20:39:07] < Harley|Burns> "Pink! Like the color of my love for you Captain!"
[20:39:10] < O5-104|Blitz> "Now, a brief description of your powers."
[20:39:35] < MacKay> "Powers, okay."
[20:39:58] < O5-104|Blitz> "Your Defensive capabilities are now 5d6. Gun Combat capabilities are 5d6. And your Melee Combat capabilities are 5d6."
[20:40:27] < MacKay> "So we're Fightan Good.   Right."
[20:40:49] < O5-104|Blitz> "And there is also a super-power attack that can only be achieved if you all use the power of LOVE and FRIENDSHIP and JUSTICE together!! But you shouldn't have to use it."
[20:40:52]  * Nioki looks at the cafeteria's fourth wall.
[20:40:55] < Exuro> "And doesn't afraid of anything?"
[20:41:14] < MacKay> [Able blew it up.]
[20:41:20] < O5-104|Blitz> "That will be a last resort though, so hopefully, we won't be needing it."
[20:41:40] < O5-104|Blitz> *BOOM* Another explosion rocks the site except it's louder now and the screams of dying personnel can be heard
[20:41:54] < MacKay> "Right...  best to tell us how, then, just to make sure we don't need it."
[20:42:10] < Exuro> "Yeah. From the sounds of that..."
[20:42:19] < O5-104|Blitz> "I will provide you logistic support from a safe Site. I'll relay any information you'll need when you need it."
[20:42:26] < Nioki> "Are there any special powers accorded depending on color?"
[20:42:37] < O5-104|Blitz> "GOOD LUCK, AGENTS OF JUSTICE!"
[20:43:02] < O5-104|Blitz> "MIGHTY MORHING FOUNDATION AGENTS, MISSION....STAAAAATO!!"
[20:43:12] < O5-104|Blitz> And with a puff of smoke, Ten-Four disappears from the podium.
[20:43:15] *** You're now known as Blitz
[20:43:37] *** You're now known as BlitzBlack
[20:43:43] < BlitzBlack> *BOOM*
[20:43:45]  * Exuro blinks a bit.
[20:43:50] *** Nioki is now known as NiokiYellow
[20:43:57] *** Exuro is now known as ExuroRed
[20:44:00] *** Harley|Burns is now known as Harley_Agent_Of_Love
[20:44:00] < MacKay> "This still isn't the most ridiculous thing..."  MacKay says.  
[20:44:08] < Doctor_Light> Meanwhile, in the Senior Staff Secret Bunker, Light chews some popcorn.
[20:44:18] *** MacKay is now known as MacKayBlueMedic
[20:44:27] < BlitzBlack> The comms in their helmets crackle. "Testing, testing. This is Ten-Four. SCP-076-2 is currently advancing on your position at a frightening speed. Be ready!"
[20:44:28]  * Break drinks some whiskey in her room. Meh. :|
[20:44:42]  * NiokiYellow points his palm at the wall, and /wills/ his power through it.
[20:44:58]  * Gerald is in Tamlin at the moment.
[20:45:20]  * MacKayBlueMedic draws his katana, which is actually on his character sheet, and seems to be perfectly in tune to whatever is going on.
[20:45:27] < BlitzBlack> Sand bursts out of Nioki's hand and demolishes the wall!
[20:46:01] < NiokiYellow> "Oops. I hope they don't expect me to pay for that."
[20:46:01] < MacKayBlueMedic> "I hope they aren't going to take that out of your salary."
[20:46:09]  * Harley_Agent_Of_Love focuses his love for the Captain into his armstump.
[20:46:26]  * ExuroRed notices Nioki's ability and gets somewhat of a slasher smile before attemping the same.
[20:46:40]  * NiokiYellow forces his will into the shape of a large hammer.
[20:46:46] < BlitzBlack> A new pink arm materializes out of the stump and then shoots large pink energy hearts at the floor! *BOOM*
[20:46:58] < BlitzBlack> Nioki gets a large sand hammer...that crumbles
[20:47:10] < NiokiYellow> "Ah, come on."
[20:47:17] < BlitzBlack> Exuro gets fire. His hand catches on fire though and starts burning
[20:47:55] < ExuroRed> "THIS IS TOTALLY WORTH IT. NOW COULD YOU EXTINGUISH ME PLEASE DOCTOR."
[20:48:05] < BlitzBlack> Blitz stares at the others testing their powers and wonders what power he would get.
[20:48:29]  * MacKayBlueMedic extinguishes Exuro.
[20:48:47] < BlitzBlack> Everybody roll defense!
[20:48:57] < MacKayBlueMedic> "I'll assume you were talking to me.   I'll save my Mighty Blueness for a target, then."
[20:49:02] < MacKayBlueMedic> 5d6
[20:49:02] < Enki> MacKayBlueMedic, 5d6: 22 [5d6=3,4,5,4,6]
[20:49:15] < ExuroRed> 5d6 Defense is go!
[20:49:15] < Enki> ExuroRed, Defense is go!: 18 [5d6=2,4,4,5,3]
[20:49:29] < NiokiYellow> 5d6
[20:49:30] < Enki> NiokiYellow, 5d6: 20 [5d6=1,6,4,3,6]
[20:49:36] < BlitzBlack> 5d6 Defense
[20:49:37] < Enki> BlitzBlack, Defense: 22 [5d6=3,6,4,5,4]
[20:50:25] < Harley_Agent_Of_Love> 5d6
[20:50:26] < Enki> Harley_Agent_Of_Love, 5d6: 18 [5d6=5,3,1,6,3]
[20:50:30] < BlitzBlack> 6d6 Cyber Rocket Barrage!
[20:50:31] < Enki> BlitzBlack, Cyber Rocket Barrage!: 21 [6d6=3,3,4,5,3,3]
[20:50:37] < BlitzBlack> *EXPLOSION*
[20:50:51] < BlitzBlack> The entire wall with the cafeteria door just EXPLODES
[20:51:19] < BlitzBlack> Most of the ceiling is blasted away and there is no more door. Exuro and Harley each get hit by a door
[20:51:30] < BlitzBlack> The others are just blown back and slammed into the wall
[20:51:51] *** You're now known as BlitzBlack|CyberAble
[20:52:19]  * ExuroRed is door'd and floor'd. "OW."
[20:52:22] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> And when the smoke clears, oh my fucking 343, it is Able. And he's meaner and angrier than ever
[20:52:34] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> INFO: SCP-076-2-Cyber
[20:53:01] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> Melee Combat Sword x2: 6d6
[20:53:34] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> Shoulder-Mounted Cyber Rocket Launchers: 2 6d6 launchers on each shoulder
[20:53:47] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> Melee Combat Kickass Spike Boots x2: 6d6
[20:54:00] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> Angry Cyber Able Jaw x1: 6d6
[20:54:23] < NiokiYellow> "He looks tough! We'll need to work together to pull this off."
[20:54:26] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> Height: 257cm
[20:54:34] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> Body Illumination: Neon blue
[20:54:44]  * Roadrunner has pinned a note to Director Strelnikov's door. He should probably look at it. (THIS MEANS IT'S FOR YOU, WAXX)
[20:55:19] < MacKayBlueMedic> "Yeah, let's go with that."  MacKay mentally shrugs.  "Ready?" 
[20:55:22] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> Defensive Cyber-Armor+Helmet: 6d6
[20:55:47]  * ExuroRed pulls himself up off the floor. "Ready as I ever will be."
[20:56:14]  * Harley_Agent_Of_Love pushes the door off of him.
[20:56:22]  * NiokiYellow peels himself out of the wall. "We have to be."
[20:56:37] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> Cyber Able - Formerly known as SCP-076-2. He has been infected by an unknown more technologically advanced version of SCP-217 and has gone into a berserker rage. Recommended course of action: Flee
[20:56:47] < Harley_Agent_Of_Love> "SECRET BASES ARE FOR TORTURE AND CONTAINMENT! IN THE NAME OF THE FOUNDATION, I WILL PUNISH YOU!"
[20:57:34] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> Cyber Able tells a deep breath, his body seeming to grow a little bit and the visible internal digital circuits flashing faster as he breathes in
[20:57:46] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> ...and then he FUCKING *ROARS*
[20:58:00] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> "GGGGGGGGGRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
[20:58:02]  * NiokiYellow flips out his pistol, and fires at Able's mouth.
[20:58:02] < MacKayBlueMedic> "Okay, then:  FOR LOVE!  FOR HONOR!  FOR GREAT JUSTICE!  MIGHTY MORPHIN FOUNDATION BLUE SHUT YOUR PIE HOLE GO!"
[20:58:14] < NiokiYellow> 5d6!
[20:58:15] < Enki> NiokiYellow, 5d6!: 18 [5d6=2,2,6,5,3]
[20:58:42] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> "EVERYBODY, FIRE!!"
[20:58:45] < MacKayBlueMedic> 5d6 By the Power of BLUE I will wash YOU!
[20:58:45] < Enki> MacKayBlueMedic, By the Power of BLUE I will wash YOU!: 20 [5d6=4,2,3,5,6]
[20:58:47] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> 5d6 Pew pew
[20:58:47] < Enki> BlitzBlack|CyberAble, Pew pew: 21 [5d6=5,6,2,4,4]
[20:59:13]  * ExuroRed raises his MP5 and fires a burst of shots! 5d6
[20:59:30] < ExuroRed> 5d6 :U
[20:59:30] < Enki> ExuroRed, :U: 18 [5d6=3,4,2,6,3]
[21:00:47]  * Harley_Agent_Of_Love raises his gun and fires.
[21:00:50] < Harley_Agent_Of_Love> 5d6 SHOOTAN
[21:00:50] < Enki> Harley_Agent_Of_Love, SHOOTAN: 18 [5d6=6,6,1,3,2]
[21:00:59] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> 6d6 Cyber-Armour
[21:00:59] < Enki> BlitzBlack|CyberAble, Cyber-Armour: 17 [6d6=1,3,1,2,4,6]
[21:01:31] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> They're weapons were actually effective!
[21:01:38] < NiokiYellow> [THEY ALL HIT]
[21:02:01] < Roadrunner> A tiny device pops out of the ceiling. It has 'LOL EMP' written on it.
[21:02:06] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> Their unique bursts of energy blast through Cyber-Able's Sonic Roar Attack and all score hits on him!
[21:02:31]  * ExuroRed looks impressed with himself. "The power of LOVE prevails?"
[21:02:41] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> 5d5 Damage check
[21:02:41] < Enki> BlitzBlack|CyberAble, Damage check: 15 [5d5=4,1,3,3,4]
[21:03:03] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> Two shots punch through Cyber-Able's chest and one hits him in the eye!
[21:03:05] < MacKayBlueMedic> "I think so.   Better than some alternatives."
[21:03:14] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> The other two shots hit him in the arms!
[21:03:25] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> Cyber-Able is now fucking pissed
[21:03:44] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> 6d6 ROCKET BARRAGE
[21:03:45] < Enki> BlitzBlack|CyberAble, ROCKET BARRAGE: 18 [6d6=2,6,2,2,1,5]
[21:03:47] < MacKayBlueMedic> "Hey, Yogi, I think we made the Ranger angry."
[21:04:02] < NiokiYellow> 5d6 dodgin'...
[21:04:03] < Enki> NiokiYellow, dodgin'...: 11 [5d6=5,1,1,1,3]
[21:04:13] < NiokiYellow> [>:(]
[21:04:17] < MacKayBlueMedic> 5d6 Mighty Morphin GET OUTTA MY WAY!
[21:04:18] < Enki> MacKayBlueMedic, Mighty Morphin GET OUTTA MY WAY!: 14 [5d6=2,5,1,2,4]
[21:04:32] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> 5d6 Blitz Defense!
[21:04:32] < Enki> BlitzBlack|CyberAble, Blitz Defense!: 21 [5d6=4,6,5,4,2]
[21:04:34] < ExuroRed> 4d6 DUCK
[21:04:34] < Enki> ExuroRed, DUCK: 19 [4d6=5,5,4,5]
[21:05:39] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> Cyber-Able lets out another angry roar and shoots a whole goddamn lot of rockets
[21:05:48] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> IT'S LIKE THERE'S AN INFINITE AMOUNT OF THEM
[21:06:09] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> The rockets all hit MacKay, Nioki, and Exuro (lose 1 defense dice)
[21:06:28] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> Blitz manages to jump out of the way before being sent flying into a wall again
[21:07:00] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> Despite the severity of the attack, they're more or less only slightly injured
[21:07:11] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> The Weapon X-94's are obviously very, very useful
[21:08:17]  * ExuroRed clears his head and concentrates on Cyber!Able again. "Did John Woo design this fucking thing or what? Where does it keep getting rockets?"
[21:08:39] < Harley_Agent_Of_Love> 5d6 DEFENSE
[21:08:40] < Enki> Harley_Agent_Of_Love, DEFENSE: 20 [5d6=4,6,5,1,4]
[21:09:00] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> Harley is sent flying too, unharmed
[21:09:46] < MacKayBlueMedic> "Okay, that wasn't terribly fun."  MacKay shakes himself off.  "All right, now what should I try?  I wish I watched more anime."  
[21:09:54]  * NiokiYellow picks himself up.
[21:10:04]  * NiokiYellow looks at Able.
[21:10:08] < Harley_Agent_Of_Love> "YOU'LL NEED MORE THAN THAT TO DEFEAT MY LOVE! GO! SUGAR HEART MASTURBATION!"
[21:10:12] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> *Kccsk* The comm crackles on again. "This is Ten-Four. For those of you unfamiliar with Able's usual containment procedures, you have to destroy his head to immobilize him and then get him to SCP-076-1 as soon as possible."
[21:10:19]  * Harley_Agent_Of_Love focuses his will into his armstump and fires at Able.
[21:10:32]  * NiokiYellow opens his mouth and wills his power into...
[21:10:44] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> "You got two hits through his body armour and 1 through his helmet. Hit his head 5 more times or destroy his armour and you should be able to destroy him in one hit."
[21:10:46] < NiokiYellow> SAND ROAR! RAAAAAGH!
[21:11:30] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> "Containment teams are en-route with SCP-076-1, so stop SCP-076-2-Cyber as soon as possible! Ten-Four out!"
[21:11:40] < Harley_Agent_Of_Love> 5d6 SUGAR HEART MASTURBATION!
[21:11:40] < Enki> Harley_Agent_Of_Love, SUGAR HEART MASTURBATION!: 19 [5d6=4,5,6,3,1]
[21:11:55] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> 4d6 Not a headshot!
[21:11:56] < Enki> BlitzBlack|CyberAble, Not a headshot!: 13 [4d6=2,2,6,3]
[21:12:02] < NiokiYellow> 5d6 the power of sand and sound combined!
[21:12:03] < Enki> NiokiYellow, the power of sand and sound combined!: 15 [5d6=3,4,2,5,1]
[21:12:17] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> 5d6 More lasers!
[21:12:18] < Enki> BlitzBlack|CyberAble, More lasers!: 10 [5d6=1,3,3,1,2]
[21:12:20] < NiokiYellow> [is... not all that effective, it seems!]
[21:12:38]  * ExuroRed decides to take a page out of... Poke'mon. Raises a hand and roars... "Fire Blast!"
[21:12:56] < ExuroRed> 5d6 Fire Blast wut
[21:12:57] < Enki> ExuroRed, Fire Blast wut: 20 [5d6=5,5,3,3,4]
[21:13:19] < MacKayBlueMedic> "Okay then, let's dance."  MacKay wields his KATANA and shouts, "By the Might of FOUR-CHAN and FA/TG/UYS EVERYWHERE, KATANA CUT THROUGH ANYTHING HASSAN CHOP!"
[21:13:32] < MacKayBlueMedic> 5d6 Masterwork Katana, bitches.
[21:13:32] < Enki> MacKayBlueMedic, Masterwork Katana, bitches.: 23 [5d6=4,5,6,4,4]
[21:13:44] < NiokiYellow> [...]
[21:14:43] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> Cyber-Able reacts to their attacks this time and puts up an energy barrier!
[21:15:39] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> Blitz's lasers harmlessly bounce off but just when it seems like Cyber-Able has a new defense, the flood of sand SMASHES THROUGH the barrier, melting into a molten wave of glass and engulfs Cyber-Able
[21:16:20] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> Cyber-Able shrieks metallically and slashes the now-solidified glass only to get hit by the fire blast and Harley's pink-Chechen-essence ejaculate
[21:17:19] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> The cybernetic monster staggers back a bit, most of his body armour destroyed (2 HP left in the helmet)
[21:17:45] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> Now, suddenly all of the cyber rocket launchers open up at once!
[21:18:19]  * MacKayBlueMedic floats in mid-air, all cool as if he were in the Matrix.
[21:18:42] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> As his circuits turn red from the overload, he unleashes the launchers and dashes forward to slash at all of the MMF Agents!
[21:18:47]  * NiokiYellow has a swirling sandstorm rising about him.
[21:18:53] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> [ Everybody roll defense twice ]
[21:18:58] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> 6d6 ROCKETS EVERYWHERE
[21:18:59] < Enki> BlitzBlack|CyberAble, ROCKETS EVERYWHERE: 20 [6d6=1,5,6,1,1,6]
[21:19:05] < Harley_Agent_Of_Love> 5d6 Defense
[21:19:05] < Enki> Harley_Agent_Of_Love, Defense: 16 [5d6=4,1,4,3,4]
[21:19:06] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> 6d6 SWORDS EVERYWHERE
[21:19:06] < Harley_Agent_Of_Love> 5d6 Defense
[21:19:06] < Enki> Harley_Agent_Of_Love, Defense: 21 [5d6=5,1,3,6,6]
[21:19:07] < Enki> BlitzBlack|CyberAble, SWORDS EVERYWHERE: 25 [6d6=5,5,4,6,1,4]
[21:19:11] < ExuroRed> Oh 3d6
[21:19:15] < NiokiYellow> 5d6 defense 1
[21:19:15] < Enki> NiokiYellow, defense 1: 14 [5d6=2,3,2,5,2]
[21:19:22] < ExuroRed> 3d6 Oh...
[21:19:22] < Enki> ExuroRed, Oh...: 11 [3d6=6,3,2]
[21:19:23] < NiokiYellow> 5d6 defense 2
[21:19:24] < Enki> NiokiYellow, defense 2: 11 [5d6=1,1,5,3,1]
[21:19:35] < NiokiYellow> [Enki hates me.]
[21:19:37] < MacKayBlueMedic> 4d6 DefCon 1
[21:19:37] < Enki> MacKayBlueMedic, DefCon 1: 19 [4d6=4,4,6,5]
[21:19:38] < ExuroRed> SHIT. 3d6
[21:19:42] < MacKayBlueMedic> 4d6 DefCon 2
[21:19:42] < Enki> MacKayBlueMedic, DefCon 2: 10 [4d6=2,6,1,1]
[21:19:56] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> 5d6 Blitz Defense 1
[21:19:57] < Enki> BlitzBlack|CyberAble, Blitz Defense 1: 17 [5d6=4,2,4,3,4]
[21:19:57] < ExuroRed> 3d6 SHIT.
[21:19:58] < Enki> ExuroRed, SHIT.: 7 [3d6=2,1,4]
[21:19:58] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> 5d6 Blitz Defense 2
[21:19:59] < Enki> BlitzBlack|CyberAble, Blitz Defense 2: 16 [5d6=4,2,2,2,6]
[21:20:22] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> Oh boy
[21:20:30] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> Angry Cyber-Able is really powerful and/or lucky
[21:20:57] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> The Agents didn't stand a chance under the barrage of cyber-rockets that Cyber-Able shot as he also slashed them up while they were getting hit
[21:21:43] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> Like true Mighty Morphing Foundation Agents, every slash that connected against their suits create explosive SPARKS that injure them gravely while maintaining suit integrity
[21:22:18] *** RightsBoobies is now known as Rights
[21:22:30] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> Harley shrieks like a little girl and panty flashes a non-existent audience after Cyber-Able slashes him arbitrarily from behind
[21:22:37] < Harley_Agent_Of_Love> [I approve.]
[21:23:09] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> "YOU PUNY WEAKLINGS!!"
[21:23:15] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> "YOU'RE ALL NO MATCH FOR ME!!"
[21:23:24] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> "IS THERE NO-ONE STRONG ENOUGH TO FIGHT ME?!!!?!"
[21:23:44]  * NiokiYellow flies backwards. Which is what happens when you get hit. Always.
[21:23:44] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> "IS THIS THE BEST THE OH-SO-GREAT FOUNDATION COULD THROW AGAINST ME?!!?!"
[21:24:11] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> Suddenly
[21:24:16] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> Cyber-Able's left arm falls off
[21:24:22]  * ExuroRed manages to scrape himself off the wall, sounding completely deadpan. "Go fuck yourself, Able." :|
[21:24:28] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> "WWWWWWHHHHHHHAAAAAAATTTTTTTTT?!????????!!!?!?!!!?!"
[21:24:40] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> [ Super-pro sword-slice delay ]
[21:24:56] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> "NOW WE'RE TALKING!! MUAHAHAH!!!"
[21:24:58]  * NiokiYellow leaps up and raises his fist. "You haven't seen anything yet. Agents, form up!"
[21:25:20] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> Blitz jumps out of the rubble and stands next to Nioki!
[21:25:33] < NiokiYellow> "For JUSTICE!"
[21:25:49] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> "For HONOUR!"
[21:25:55]  * ExuroRed takes his place next to Nioki, as well. "For the FOUNDATION!"
[21:25:59]  * Harley_Agent_Of_Love does a one armed kip up.
[21:26:01]  * MacKayBlueMedic leaps up, "for LOVE! And Awesome chocolate brownies!"
[21:26:06] < Harley_Agent_Of_Love> "FOR THE CAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIN!"
[21:26:30] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> "LET'S DO IT TOGETHER! OUR FINAL ATTACK!"
[21:26:34] < NiokiYellow> "For FRIENDSHIP! SUPER ATTACK!"
[21:27:10] < ExuroRed> "FINAL ATTACK! FOR GREAT JUSTICE!"
[21:27:29]  * BlitzBlack|CyberAble generates a giant hammer from his arms and smashes the ground. "TERRAN PILE-DRIVER!!"
[21:27:41]  * NiokiYellow points both palms forward, and joins his power of will with the other agents.
[21:27:41] < MacKayBlueMedic> "Go go FOUNDATION AGENTS!"
[21:27:52] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> 5d6 FINAL ATTACK!
[21:27:53] < Enki> BlitzBlack|CyberAble, FINAL ATTACK!: 21 [5d6=6,5,6,1,3]
[21:28:36]  * ExuroRed pulls out his framelock knife, which explodes into a FLAMING SWORD in true anime final attack style.
[21:29:07] < ExuroRed> 5d6 BURNING BLADE OF THE FOUNDATION!
[21:29:08] < Enki> ExuroRed, BURNING BLADE OF THE FOUNDATION!: 16 [5d6=5,6,3,1,1]
[21:29:12] < NiokiYellow> [Final attack. Combine all roles into... dare I say it... 25d6?]
[21:29:27]  * Harley_Agent_Of_Love wills energy into the shape of Stalin.
[21:29:29]  * MacKayBlueMedic concentrates, working on the best possible attack. "POWER OF LOVE OFFENSIVE GLOMP OF SEXY FUN TIME OFFENSIVE OSCULATION, GO!!!!!" He then spins wildly to hit Able, and kiss him passionately on the lips.
[21:29:29] < NiokiYellow> 5d6 sand blast!
[21:29:30] < Enki> NiokiYellow, sand blast!: 22 [5d6=2,3,5,6,6]
[21:29:37] < Harley_Agent_Of_Love> 5d6
[21:29:37] < Enki> Harley_Agent_Of_Love, 5d6: 21 [5d6=2,4,4,5,6]
[21:29:46] < MacKayBlueMedic> 5d6 Love You Long Time!
[21:29:46] < Enki> MacKayBlueMedic, Love You Long Time!: 17 [5d6=2,2,1,6,6]
[21:30:06] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> 2d6 CYBER ABLE IS GETTING PWWWWWWWNNNEEDDD
[21:30:07] < Enki> BlitzBlack|CyberAble, CYBER ABLE IS GETTING PWWWWWWWNNNEEDDD: 3 [2d6=2,1]
[21:30:18] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> 25d6 EXPLOSIVE DICE
[21:30:19] < Enki> BlitzBlack|CyberAble, EXPLOSIVE DICE: 88 [25d6=6,5,5,3,3,3,3,6,5,1,4,2,4,1,5,5,2,1,1,2,5,5,2,6,3]
[21:31:12] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> THE GROUND SHAKES AND SHUDDERS AND MOUNTAINS POP OUT OF THE GROUND AND SMASH INTO CYBER-ABLE AND PINS HIM
[21:31:21] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> CYBER-ABLE CRIES OUT IN SURPRISE AND PAIN
[21:32:03] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> THEN THE SAND BLAST SMASHES INTO HIM, DIRECTED BY THE NEW MOUNTAINS TO FLOW BACK AND HIT CYBER-ABLE AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN
[21:33:10] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> AS THE SANDSTORM GETS FIERCE, MACKAY EMERGES FROM THE CHAOS AND KISSES CYBER-ABLE FULLY ON THE LIPS
[21:33:44] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> AND WITH THE POWER OF STALINISM, CYBER-ABLE LOSES ALL OF HIS ECONOMIC AND POLITICAL FREEDOM
[21:33:57] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> AND THEN SLASH
[21:34:04] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> SLASHSLASHSLASHSLASHSLASHSLASHSLASHSLASHSLASHSLASHSLASHSLASH
[21:34:45] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> RED STREAKS QUICKLY TRAVEL ALL OVER CYBER-ABLE'S BODY AND EVERYTHING CLEARS, WITH EXURO, THE RED MIGHTY MORPHING FOUNDATION AGENT MATERIALIZING BEHIND CYBER-ABLE
[21:34:45] < MacKayBlueMedic> [Oh, baby, slash me but good...]
[21:35:09] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> And all was quiet
[21:35:13] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> THEN BOOM
[21:36:12] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble>                                                             .         .           
[21:36:12] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> 8 888888888o       ,o888888o.         ,o888888o.           ,8.       ,8.          
[21:36:12] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> 8 8888    `88.  . 8888     `88.    . 8888     `88.        ,888.     ,888.         
[21:36:12] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> 8 8888     `88 ,8 8888       `8b  ,8 8888       `8b      .`8888.   .`8888.        
[21:36:12] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> 8 8888     ,88 88 8888        `8b 88 8888        `8b    ,8.`8888. ,8.`8888.       
[21:36:12] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> 8 8888.   ,88' 88 8888         88 88 8888         88   ,8'8.`8888,8^8.`8888.      
[21:36:12] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> 8 8888888888   88 8888         88 88 8888         88  ,8' `8.`8888' `8.`8888.     
[21:36:12] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> 8 8888    `88. 88 8888        ,8P 88 8888        ,8P ,8'   `8.`88'   `8.`8888.    
[21:36:12] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> 8 8888      88 `8 8888       ,8P  `8 8888       ,8P ,8'     `8.`'     `8.`8888.   
[21:36:12] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> 8 8888    ,88'  ` 8888     ,88'    ` 8888     ,88' ,8'       `8        `8.`8888.  
[21:36:12] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> 8 888888888P       `8888888P'         `8888888P'  ,8'         `         `8.`8888. 
[21:36:38] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble>                                                                                                                                                         
[21:36:41] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> 8 8888888888   `8.`8888.      ,8' 8 888888888o   8 8888         ,o888888o.       d888888o.    8 8888     ,o888888o.     b.             8    d888888o.   
[21:36:41] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> 8 8888          `8.`8888.    ,8'  8 8888    `88. 8 8888      . 8888     `88.   .`8888:' `88.  8 8888  . 8888     `88.   888o.          8  .`8888:' `88. 
[21:36:41] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> 8 8888           `8.`8888.  ,8'   8 8888     `88 8 8888     ,8 8888       `8b  8.`8888.   Y8  8 8888 ,8 8888       `8b  Y88888o.       8  8.`8888.   Y8 
[21:36:41] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> 8 8888            `8.`8888.,8'    8 8888     ,88 8 8888     88 8888        `8b `8.`8888.      8 8888 88 8888        `8b .`Y888888o.    8  `8.`8888.     
[21:36:41] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> 8 888888888888     `8.`88888'     8 8888.   ,88' 8 8888     88 8888         88  `8.`8888.     8 8888 88 8888         88 8o. `Y888888o. 8   `8.`8888.    
[21:36:41] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> 8 8888             .88.`8888.     8 888888888P'  8 8888     88 8888         88   `8.`8888.    8 8888 88 8888         88 8`Y8o. `Y88888o8    `8.`8888.   
[21:36:41] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> 8 8888            .8'`8.`8888.    8 8888         8 8888     88 8888        ,8P    `8.`8888.   8 8888 88 8888        ,8P 8   `Y8o. `Y8888     `8.`8888.  
[21:36:41] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> 8 8888           .8'  `8.`8888.   8 8888         8 8888     `8 8888       ,8P 8b   `8.`8888.  8 8888 `8 8888       ,8P  8      `Y8o. `Y8 8b   `8.`8888. 
[21:36:41] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> 8 8888          .8'    `8.`8888.  8 8888         8 8888      ` 8888     ,88'  `8b.  ;8.`8888  8 8888  ` 8888     ,88'   8         `Y8o.` `8b.  ;8.`8888 
[21:36:41] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> 8 888888888888 .8'      `8.`8888. 8 8888         8 888888888888 `8888888P'     `Y8888P ,88P'  8 8888     `8888888P'     8            `Yo  `Y8888P ,88P' 
[21:37:23] *** BlitzBlack|CyberAble was kicked from #scpactiveduty by Gerald [Gerald]
--- Log closed Thu Apr 01 21:37:23 2010
--- Log opened Thu Apr 01 21:37:30 2010
[21:37:30] *** BlitzBlack|CyberAble [rkh@synIRC-A12F7A49.pfak.org] has joined #scpactiveduty
[21:37:30] *** Irssi: #scpactiveduty: Total of 22 nicks [1 ops, 0 halfops, 0 voices, 21 normal]
[21:37:31] *** Irssi: Join to #scpactiveduty was synced in 1 secs
[21:37:42] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> AND CYBER-ABLE WAS VANQUISHED
[21:37:57] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> SHREDS OF HIS CYBERNETIC BODY FALL FROM THE SKY
[21:38:10] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> AND THE CONTAINMENT TEAM ARRIVES WITH 076-1 TO CONTAIN THE PIECES
[21:38:21]  * Harley_Agent_Of_Love poses. Mightily.
[21:38:40] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> BlitzBlack poses next to Harley!
[21:38:43]  * MacKayBlueMedic spits out Able's tongue. "Too bad. He was a pretty good kisser."
[21:38:58]  * NiokiYellow 's sand swirls up around him mightily.
[21:38:59]  * ExuroRed dramatically puts away his weapon to pose even /more/ dramatically.
[21:39:47] < BlitzBlack|CyberAble> And once again, the MIGHTY MORPHING FOUNDATION AGENTS have SAVED THE DAY!
[21:40:08] *** You're now known as O5-104|BlitzBlack
[21:40:49] < O5-104|BlitzBlack> Suddenly, the five MMFA's hear some clapping
[21:41:33]  * Harley_Agent_Of_Love spins. The skirt flaps. You can clearly see the codpiece isn't very flattering.
[21:41:34] < O5-104|BlitzBlack> When they all turn around to the source, they see Ten-Four clapping from his apparently undamaged podium!
[21:41:36]  * MacKayBlueMedic does a pirouette and then sheaths his katana.
[21:42:01] < O5-104|BlitzBlack> "Bravo! Bravo! Magnificent! Maaaarvelous!"
[21:42:24] < O5-104|BlitzBlack> Ten-Four steps down from the podium and walks towards the Agents while clapping
[21:42:31]  * NiokiYellow lets the sand die down.
[21:42:53] < O5-104|BlitzBlack> "That was a splendid performance, and an obviously successful field test against a controlled containment break!"
[21:43:14] < Harley_Agent_Of_Love> "..."
[21:43:20]  * NiokiYellow 's sand springs back up.
[21:43:31] < O5-104|BlitzBlack> "That was truly beautiful." Ten-Four wipes a tear from his eye
[21:43:33] < ExuroRed> "I- uh- WHAT."
[21:43:41] < NiokiYellow> "You... put us in front of missiles."
[21:44:06] < ExuroRed> "Lots and lots of missiles."
[21:44:26] < NiokiYellow> "And swords."
[21:44:37] < Harley_Agent_Of_Love> "...The Captain is not in danger."
[21:44:41] < Harley_Agent_Of_Love> ...
[21:44:42] < Harley_Agent_Of_Love> >:C
[21:44:56] < MacKayBlueMedic> "Eh, still wasn't the worst day I've had."   MacKay smiles, "Although this outfit would have been better with thigh-high spiked heels."
[21:45:59] < O5-104|BlitzBlack> "Oh, he was in danger. If you didn't stop SCP-076-2-Cyber, then the world would have been in danger."
[21:46:18] < Harley_Agent_Of_Love> "..."
[21:46:32] < O5-104|BlitzBlack> "I mean, given the SCP-217-2 virus, it would've turned into a XK-class end-of-the-world scenario."
[21:46:32] < ExuroRed> "I wouldn't have minded it if it wasn't for the fact that my spleen is probably having lunch with my lungs right now."
[21:46:54] < NiokiYellow> "You put the world at danger simply to test these... suits."
[21:47:21] < O5-104|BlitzBlack> "But enough of that. Do you know why the prototypes are called Weapon X-94s?"
[21:47:36] < ExuroRed> "...Do tell."
[21:48:26] < MacKayBlueMedic> "Not yet, no."
[21:48:52]  * MacKayBlueMedic takes a moment to remove the dental dam.
[21:49:18] < O5-104|BlitzBlack> "Because they're upgrades of Weapon X-92."
[21:49:44] < NiokiYellow> "Which is?"
[21:50:07] < O5-104|BlitzBlack> "And for those of you unfamiliar with the Lobotomizer, they exist to keeps the gods like yourself...in containment."
[21:50:12]  * O5-104|BlitzBlack snaps his fingers
[21:50:14] < O5-104|BlitzBlack> *BZZT*
[21:50:18] < O5-104|BlitzBlack> Everybody blacks out
[21:50:38]  * NiokiYellow has now been two gods.
[21:50:46] < O5-104|BlitzBlack> Because a razor disk in their helmets starts spinning and effectively cutting off their brain stems
[21:51:19]  * ExuroRed lets out a final FFFFUUUUUUUU- before going out cold.
[21:51:23] < O5-104|BlitzBlack> "Muahahaha", Ten-Four laughs maniacally as they all go down.
[21:51:26] < O5-104|BlitzBlack> "MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA"
[21:51:45]  * O5-104|BlitzBlack delightfully skips towards the bodies to examine them closely
[21:52:25] <&Break> THe familiar sound of helicopter blades whipping through the air echoes throughout the site....
[21:53:16] < O5-104|BlitzBlack> "What? That can't be!"
[21:53:36] <&Break> ....followed by a site-shaking boom, which tears through the front defensive wall.
[21:53:39] < O5-104|BlitzBlack> "Nobody was supposed to be close enough to the site because of the explosions and energy bursts!"
[21:53:43] < O5-104|BlitzBlack> "AHHH!!"
[21:54:04] < O5-104|BlitzBlack> Ten-Four shields himself form the blow and jumps back a bit and lands in front of his podium
[21:54:15] <&Break> A hail of bullets tears through the cafeteria wall, follow by the a few clinks.
[21:54:35] <&Break> Ten-Four looks down long enough to see that the source of the tapping noise is a primed grenade.
[21:54:49] < O5-104|BlitzBlack> "FFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUU---" *BOOM*
[21:55:45] <&Break> Several lightly armored agents follow the explosion, with a young woman - dressed in an opera mask, a tux, and a top hat, no less - coming up from behind.
[21:55:47]  * MacKay would be surprised that there was a wall still in existance, but he's in his happy place at the moment.
[21:56:18]  * ExuroRed would have to agree there. But happy place and all.
[21:56:37] <&Break> As the smoke clears, A stream of Italian curses of varying length, intensity, and creativity sputters forth from Ten's mouth.
[21:56:38] < Clef> Somewhere out there, Clef looks up from his magazine. 
[21:56:46] *** Break is now known as O5-10
[21:56:50] < O5-104|BlitzBlack> "Nnn...nooo...." Ten-Four mutters.
[21:57:15]  * O5-10 digs a heel into Ten-Four's back. "....and who the fuck are you, again?"
[21:57:55] < O5-104|BlitzBlack> "This...t41s...d1s 1z |\/|y...wu|27|)....gtfo j00 n00b...."
[21:58:16] <&O5-10> "...Hagger." :|
[21:58:38] < O5-104|BlitzBlack> "a/s/l, b17ch3z?!!"
[21:58:40]  * O5-10 kicks TEn-Four aside...then then finally realizes what the hell she's wearing.
[21:59:05] <&O5-10> She quickly casts the tux jacket and top hat aside, trading it in favor of her usual long coat.
[21:59:13] <&O5-10> "Alright. I demand an explanation, here."
[21:59:46] < NiokiYellow> There is no reply from the brainstem-severed agents.
[21:59:48]  * Harley|Burns is busy being brainded.
[21:59:48] < O5-104|BlitzBlack> "lolol.....j00.........l00z3"
[22:00:34]  * O5-10 is unamused, and calls Gerald. "Get your pasty ass here. -Yesterday-."
[22:01:12] <@Gerald> In roughly thirty four and a half seconds, Gerald comes running in.
[22:01:21] <@Gerald> "Yes ma'am wha-."
[22:01:23] <@Gerald> "..."
[22:01:25] <@Gerald> "Wat."
[22:01:28] < O5-104|BlitzBlack> [ Gerald, roll a 1d6 ]
[22:01:44] <@Gerald> 1d6
[22:01:45] < Enki> Gerald, 1d6: 2 [1d6=2]
[22:02:40]  * Harley|Burns 's skirt ruffles gently in the breeze.
[22:03:01] <@Gerald> "Er.....Should I be dressed up, too?"
[22:03:03] < O5-104|BlitzBlack> Gerald is distracted by the skirt and trips on the rubble and lands on the sheathed fire sword
[22:03:05]  * Gerald is damn confused.
[22:03:12] < O5-104|BlitzBlack> Gerald IS ON FIRE
[22:03:14]  * Gerald is also on fire.
[22:03:49]  * ExuroRed somehow managed to immolate Gerald from /beyond the grave./
[22:04:26]  * MacKay isn't dead, 'e's just pinin'.
[22:04:29]  * O5-10 shoots the sprinklers into activity.
[22:04:39] <&O5-10> Everyone is wet. GG.
[22:04:46] <@Gerald> "Uh, ma'am, could you please-ah thank you."
[22:04:55] <&O5-10> "Explain. Now."
[22:05:01] < O5-104|BlitzBlack> [ Magical sprinklers after a devastating explosion! ]
[22:05:55] <@Gerald> "Damned if I know, I just got back from Tamlin less than half an hour ago." 
[22:06:28] <@Gerald> He looks around.
[22:06:37] <@Gerald> "What the hell could have caused all this?"
[22:06:55]  * O5-10 looks unamused. "I came here to check on the Able situation, get a cup of coffee, lead Dr. Laito on, and -maybe- put some laxatives in the Ruskie's zebra cake."
[22:07:00] <&O5-10> "But then -this- came up."
[22:07:54] < Roadrunner> The O5 gets a call on his PDA. Ring ring, bitch.
[22:08:01] < O5-104|BlitzBlack> The lobotomizer disks spin quietly in the desolate quiet ruins. The Agents' brain stems getting severed repeatedly over and over because the suits keep healing them
[22:08:07]  * Gerald sighs. "Hoo boy. This is going to be one hell of a clean up."
[22:08:23] < Roadrunner> O5-10, specifically.
[22:08:37]  * NiokiYellow is going to have one hell of a headache.
[22:08:59]  * O5-10 answers. "Ten here. What do you want?"
[22:09:12]  * Exuro would get up and shout WHY AREN'T YOU HELPING US... but you know. Brainstem.
[22:09:44]  * Roadrunner shouts through the phone, "DEAR GOD, THE HEART HAS BROKEN FREE! SEND HE-"
[22:10:01]  * Roadrunner hangs up, and smirks.
[22:10:10]  * Gerald walks around, surveying the damage.
[22:10:29]  * O5-10 hangs up, unamused.
[22:10:36] < Roadrunner> :|
[22:10:38] <&O5-10> "Anyway, if no one knows, I'll be back later."
[22:11:03]  * O5-10 approaches Gerald, and gives him a big kiss. "I'll be waiting," she purrs.
[22:11:03]  * Gerald nods. "Alright then, I'll see what I can do about figuring this out."
[22:11:57] < O5-104|BlitzBlack> "b00b13z!!"
[22:12:37]  * Gerald has kinda froze up. "Er, okay."
[22:12:51] <&O5-10> Commence hot makeouts and Overseer sex under the sprinklers.
[22:12:59] <@Gerald> Oh, that too.
[22:13:00] <&O5-10> But meanwhile, over at an unspecified beach....
[22:13:21] <&O5-10> Ten looks over the text file displayed on her laptop with a disapproving stare.
[22:13:30] <&O5-10> "To Dr. Agatha Rights,"
[22:13:43] <&O5-10> "While this little exprimentation in style kept me amused for all of five minutes...."
[22:13:44] <&O5-10> "...."
[22:13:51] <&O5-10> "....please do not send me this shit again."
[22:14:19]  * Rights reads her E-mail with a small pout, and then sighs, shutting off her own comptuer. "...well, I thought it was funny..."
[22:15:20]  * Gerald gets a message, and thus reads it.
[22:15:22] <@Gerald> "....."
[22:16:28] <@Gerald> "What the hell is this."
[22:16:33] <@Gerald> Ctrl-S.
[22:17:02] < O5-104|BlitzBlack> THE END
[22:17:14] < O5-104|BlitzBlack> HAPPY APRIL FOOL'S DAY
[22:17:39] *** NiokiYellow is now known as Nioki
[22:18:13]  * Nioki receives an email as he is in his quarters, reading.
[22:18:25] *** You're now known as SophosBlitz
[22:20:15]  * MacKay frowns thoughtfully as he sips his drink from the front desk of the Waiting Room. "Dear God, how did the infamous Dr. Rights even hear about me?"
[22:20:26]  * Rights hears about everything.
[22:21:04]  * Doctor_Light reads in her office.
[22:21:11] < MacKay> "Not that I would ever try to make out with an SCP...  I might be a bit curious in spots, but really now."
[22:21:22]  * SophosBlitz frowns as he reads the e-mail.
[22:21:25]  * Doctor_Light reads about -megafauna- in her office.
[22:21:27] < SophosBlitz> "..."
[22:21:34] < SophosBlitz> "...I'm black?"
[22:22:07] < Exuro> "I... honestly don't know what to make of this. And why me, of all people to end up in this?"
[22:22:13] < Nioki> "So, we are left with brain stems being severed and healed until someone helps us."
[22:22:31]  * SophosBlitz makes a query for ``Weapon X-92'' and gets nothing
[22:22:39]  * Exuro is staring at his computer screen, eyebrow-raise stuck in permanent raise mode.
[22:22:49] < Nioki> "Why am I even in this thing?"
[22:23:25] < Exuro> "I don't even /know/ a Dr. Rights."
[22:23:33]  * Gerald sighs, leaning back in his office chair. "I swear, she must go through the 732 files for inspiration."
[22:24:02]  * Harley|Burns remains blissfully unaware.
[22:24:33] <@Gerald> He pauses. "How did she even know I've talked to 10, or even what she looked like?"
[22:26:59]  * Break reads over the e-mail on her PDA while lounging in Gerald's office.
[22:27:17] <&Break> "I -really- shouldn't be surprised."
[22:27:20] <&Break> "I really shouldn't."
Unless otherwise stated, the content of this page is licensed under Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 License